Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you stay at home and regret all the gluttonous things you did on your birthday. The seven layer dip was a good idea, until you realized there were crushed Oreos in one of the layers. That’s when things got REAL. LET’S GO!
TEACH: TONY DANZA – 10:00PM Tonight (A&E) “Who’s The Boss” star Tony Danza does some actual bossing in this new reality show. The actor/TV host/autographed photo in your local deli ventures out to Philadelphia’s Northeast High School to teach tenth graders. What makes Tony qualified to be a teacher? Uhhhh… well… Hey look, he had his own talk show. Surely, that’s a sign of advanced smartness. Watch as Tony struggles with the educational bureaucracy and rebellious students who are only interested in getting Alyssa Milano’s email address. Will Tony look up to the sky and say MAMA MIA! at least three times every episode? Your one-eighth Italian grandma who pretends she’s 100% Italian is banking on it. ANTICIPATION: STAND AND DELIVER… A PIZZA PIE-A!
MAD MEN – 10:00PM Sunday (AMC) Only two episodes left this season. Though it’ll be hard to top last week’s first glimpse at the cover of “Sterling’s Gold.” That was, hands down, the funniest book cover ever. Much funnier than the “Breaking Dawn” cover. Chess? ANTICIPATION: DON DRAPER LIKES HIS SECRETARIES TO BE DISCREET!
MONSTERWOLF – 9:00PM Saturday (SyFy – an NBC/Universal network) It’s not a werewolf. Okay? Let’s just get that out of the way. This is not some sissy wolf, like Teen Wolf or Taylor Lautner. This is big, growly MONSTERWOLF! The wolf that’s a monster! He doesn’t need the lunar cycle to rip you limb from limb, child! ANTICIPATION: MONSTERWOLF!
FATAL ATTRACTIONS – 10:00PM Tonight (Animal Planet) Meet the breathtakingly stupid people who have tiger cubs as household pets. Shockingly, they have no relation to Mike Tyson. OR DO THEY?! ANTICIPATION: SIEGFRIED AND ROYED!
FOOD FEUDS – 10:00PM Sunday (Food Network) Food Network’s answer to Travel Channel’s “Food Wars” in which a bunch of locals fight over who makes the best what because they have nothing better to do. Tonight’s contest: meatballs. And really, aren’t all meatballs the same? Except for my mother’s which are the greatest in the world and I’ll stab you with a paring knife if you say otherwise. ANTICIPATION: FOOD FIGHTY!