Weekend Watch List: Ocho In Love!

Welcome to Watch List, where we identify five things on TV to watch while you stay at home and teach your five-year-old why the TV/VIDEO button on the remote isn’t to be toyed with. LET’S GO!

THE BRIDGE – 9:00PM Saturday (CBS) This new summer cop series comes to CBS direct from Canada. Yes, Canada! The Great White North! Shockingly, none of the cops on this show wear red uniforms and ride around on horses. They are also not dressed as lumberjacks, nor are they giant beavers. They’re just regular human cops, only mildly friendlier than their American counterparts. Watch as they lightly bust heads and smoke their own salmon. ANTICIPATION: COPADA!

OCHOCINCO: THE ULTIMATE CATCH – 9:00PM Sunday (VH1) Fresh off his respectable showing on “Dancing With The Stars,” Bengals wideout Chad Ochocinco segues immediately into a new reality venture, this dating show. Will Ocho prove as wily a bachelor as Flavor Flav and Bret Michaels were? Will the girls get every bit of Dade County Ocho has in him? Will he consult Ray Lewis on all love matters? Will he quit on a date after the first half? Will all trysts take place in Ocho’s custom “training room”? Tune in! ANTICIPATION: OCHO!

CHILDREN’S HOSPITAL – 10:30PM Sunday (Cartoon Network) Rob Corddry’s hilariously mean web series makes the leap to real television. Watch some of it here for a taste. I warn you: This show will be grossly offensive and mock everything you hold sacred. Which is why I’m very much looking forward to it. ANTICIPATION: CLOWN PAINT!

THE GLADES – 10:00PM Sunday (A&E) A&E’s new cop drama is set in the Florida Everglades and has more than a touch of Carl Hiaasen to it. Reviews have been good. For a while, I got this premiere confused with ABC’s “The Gates,” which is about vampires. But now we have a clear difference. “The Glades” is good. “The Gates” is bad. Keep it in mind. ANTICIPATION: GATORS CHOMPIN’!

KATE PLUS EIGHT – 9:00PM Sunday (TLC) It’s back-to-back new episodes on Sunday night, because who can get enough of Kate’s new Botoxed face? Looks like she’s continually wondering who just broke wind. Kind of an improvement, I say. Anyway, the gang gets chickens in an attempt to have their own organic eggs. I do not envy those chickens. ANTICIPATION: CLUCK CLUCK!

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